It doen't matter how much I pay them. It doesn't matter that I have consistantly led them to success in whatever venture we have undertaken. They are like simplistic children who have to have their hands held in order to get anything done.
Now, their ineptitude has put my life in danger.
"Uh, Lady Squish, dere is someone ere to see you. Shees offerin money fer infermation" my orcish assistant says as he walks out on the balcony where I have made my office.
These days I have taken up residence at the Ledgermaine Lounge in Dalaran. I prefer to work on the balcony where I can see the crowds in the streets below. I'm hoping a public presence will help my effort to recruit mercenaries into my warband.
"You say this person wants information? About what, and how much is she offering?"
My blunt assistant stares blankly at me for a moment. Obviously he didn't bother to ask. Without saying a thing he turns and heads back into the inn.
Before me on my desk lies a letter delivered to me this afternoon:
Lady Annora Sunstrider,
Loktar!! Our time has finally come! I received word last night from the Argent Crusade that the siege of Ice Crown Citadel has begun. You must rally your warband and prepare to assault the gates within a few days time. I want Bloodlust to help lead the charge! It is critical that we crush the Alliance before they reach the Frozen Throne. The glory of defeating Arthas must go to the Horde!
Saurfang is expecting you soon. You had better be prepared! Otherwise, I have a place for your head on the spires of Warsong Hold. Don't fail me elf!!
Also, I heard that you are calling yourself Squish. It is clear that you don't have a understanding of the orcish language, Squish in orcish means you are soft. Change your name you moron!
Garrosh Hellscream, Overlord of the Warsong offensive
I can't help but squirm a bit as I re-read his letter. My warband is strong, but not strong enough to assault the Citadel. We have had losses, and recruitment is slow. We need skilled people for Bloodlust but they are few and far between.
"Uh, boss. Shes a taureen and is lookin fer sumone. She says u myte know weer to look. Shes offern alot of gold" my assistant says as he returns once again.
"Alot you say?" I reply "Lemme guess, more than you have fingers?"
He nods meekly at me as he looks a the floor. Honestly, I didn't pick my assistant for his ability to do arithmatic.
"Very well, send her in" I finally say.
After a moment a Tauren woman walks out on the balcony. She is tall and looks strong, wearing plain, handmade leather clothing from head to hoof. However, in her eyes I can see a twinkle. Something is different about this Tauren.
"I am told your name is Squish and that you lead the warband called Bloodlust" she says directly to me.
I look her up and down for a moment, still perplexed about what is different about her.
"Your information is correct Tauren" I say coldly "What business do you have with me?"
The Tauren pauses for a moment and then replies "I understand that you have employed a Druid by the name of Calmfury. I am interested in finding him."
She tosses a small leather bag on my desk. Sounds to be about 15 coins.
I pick up the bag and toss it back to her. "Save your money, everyone knows that Calmfury was cut to pieces by Garrosh over two months ago."
She looks at me with that strange twinkle in her eyes again.
"You are mistaken Elf." she says to me with a sneer "he has returned and is wandering around in a disguise of sorts. You haven't had any new mercenaries in your employ, that fit the description of a Tauren Druid that no one knows, have you?" She tosses the coins back onto my desk.
In a disguise? Came back? Maybe Slasherjoe lied to me.
I do my best to hide my curiosity as I sit back down in my chair.
"A disguise huh? Hiding out from Garrosh perhaps?" I reply.
"I doubt that he is hiding out. More like he is trying to get close to get revenge on Garrosh for killing his Gruntling. Anyway, if you hear anything would you let me know? I will be in town for the next month" The Tauren says as she turns to leave.
"Wait!" I exclaim as I jump up from my chair and grab the Taurens arm. "Perhaps we can help each other more than you know... uh, what was your name?"
She turns cautiously towards me again. "My name is Charibdys"
"Please, sit down and talk with me for a moment Charibdys" I motion to a nearby chair. "Let me buy you a drink. Poklix!!"
My assistant comes running out on the balcony. "Yesh My Ladee?"
"Bring me and my Tauren friend a drink."
With a simpleton grin on his face he turns to carry out his task.
"Now, Charibdys" I say "I think we can help each other out. You see, we are preparing to assault Ice Crown Citadel and I need people of skill in my warband. I remember you from a conversation I once had with Calmfury. He said you are a powerful healer, is that correct?"
The Tauren looks at me with caution in her eyes before nodding.
"This is good, I need healers. Now, I am also in need of having Calmfury back in my assault group. Perhaps if my warband helps you find him, and you agree to convince him to help me, then we can work together. Also, I want you to come and heal my warriors during our assault."
The obviously dim witted Tauren, like there is any other kind, sits quietly for a moment and ponders my offer. Meanwhile, Poklix brings us a bottle of wine.
"Squish, I shall have to think about this for a bit. Can we talk more about this tommorrow?" she finally replies.
"Why of course. Please, let me get you a room here at the Ledgermain. It is the least I can do."
The Tauren nods before standing up to leave.
"Oh, one more thing Charibdys. Garrosh did not kill Calmfury's gruntling. No, one of my warriors saved her and hid her away. From what I understand she is living with her father in Orgrimmar."
Charibdys wheels about to face me again in with a startled look on her face.
"Perhaps we can use this to our advantage to get Calmfury to work for me again" I say with a grin. "Poklix!! Get Charibdys a room!"
My assistant grabs Charibdys by the arm and leads her back into the Inn. Clearly she is at a loss for words.
If this plan works out then I will have all the people I need to once again lead Bloodlust to glorious victory.
